Being yourself in changing times
How do you begin to love yourself?
All too often we find people scrunching up their nose at the mention of self-love, as if it’s a bit cheesy and self-indulgent. But learning to love yourself is one of the most powerful and important things you can do in life. Your heart is your power and when you become the source of love in your own life it changes everything. Your relationships, your career, your health – they all flourish when you start to love yourself.
I know it well, since I've been single parenting for a while and I tend to forget myself. It's been a journey to catch me back and to nurture myself again.
Loving your self is like falling in love with your true "you", again. By taking back old passions and practicing any kind of self-expression, being dance, photography, hiking, writing or all the above (which is my case)
I did feel well with myself when going out to the woods and hiking. I life in the Eastern Townships of Canada and I'm surrounded by nature. Since the pandemics and as a solo dad, I was limited to stay at home and to take care of my kids. Now that We start living a normal life again (whatever normal is) I start feeling well by practicing sports and taking time for myself. Do you know about Hygga? I put it in practice. Creating the ambiance at home that reveals who you are and how you want to feel helped me.
Also calling back my friends and going out with them for a simple coffee was a great support. But first of all, let me introduce myself.
Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Bernat and I'm a dad of three. I started my internet journey at the beginning on this pandemic, when I was seeking a new job. Full-time solo parenting and limited at home, I decided to launch Sol y Tierra , my e-commerce small (tiny) business. I sell items that brings joy and calm, such as pottery, home and garden décor. I also write in my blogs which is a passion to me and a great scape of daily daddy duties.
I'm present in many social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, Twitter, Youtube (where you can see me saying hi) and I publish my blogs on my website (solytierra.shop) and on Tumblr.
I try my best to add value to the conversation, so sometimes I write about my products, sometimes about lifestyle, sometimes about Outdoor Living. My subscribers get it first, so please, add you email on the subscribe list.
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What are the signs of loving yourself?
Loving ourselves means experiencing our feelings just as they are. Oftentimes, we try to push away unpleasant experiences and cling to pleasant ones. Appreciating who we are and who we become during our life journey. No judging, just embracing who you are and feeling well with it. This is the main sign of loving yourself.
According to Cosmopolitan, there are 9 significant ways to treat yourself (and wine is not included)
Life is tough. Which is why giving yourself regular rewards is super important.
But treating yourself doesn't have to mean a blowout Zara spree, a magnum of wine and an entire block of Brie. Because sometimes, too many naughty treats can actually make you feel worse - both physically and emotionally.
Here are 9 simple ways to indulge that won't crash your bank balance, cause you cavities or induce a dreadful hangover.
1. Make yourself breakfast in bed. What is it about room service that makes you feel like a total queen? Recreate that hotel royalty feeling at home by treating yourself to breakfast in bed. Mash up some avocado and chili, pile onto toasted sourdough and pour yourself some juice into a champagne flute. Pop a lone stem into a pretty vase for Instagram points and serve to your PJ-clad self on a tray. No boyfriend necessary.
2. Listen to an audiobook. Even better, pick one of your favourite childhood books. Spending an hour getting lost in a tale you loved as a teen is the perfect way to escape being a grown-up. Plus who doesn't love a healthy dose of heart-warming nostalgia? Stephen Fry whispering Harry Potter adventures into your ear is guaranteed to give you ALL the happy feels.
3. Get flower happy. Buy blooms. Put them in every room. Turn your flat into a nursery. Not only do flowers have magical powers (they’ve been scientifically proven to have a positive impact on mental health by increasing happiness and reducing anxiety), but they also smell good. You’ll be skipping home to hang in your pretty petal-filled pad.
4. Moisturise all over. There's no better way to recharge than with an at-home pamper session - starting with your skin. Exfoliate from head to toe using a homemade sugar scrub (just add lemon juice and honey) and slick an indulgent moisturiser like AVEENO Daily Moisturising Apricot & Honey scented Body Yogurt all over your body. This rich, creamy yogurt-inspired lotion keeps skin velvety soft and healthy-looking and will leave you smelling amazing.
8. Treat your feet. Your feet go through a lot in a day, so make sure you’re treating your tootsies on the regs. (Dry, cracked heels are not the one). Start with a relaxing shower to soften your skin, using AVEENO Daily Moisturising Yogurt Body Wash to soap up from head-to-toe. Pat your feet dry, follow up with a gentle foot scrub and finish with a glossy pedicure. Time to step your sassy self forward.
9. Eat something sweet (but healthy!) Gorging on a pack of Oreos in bed might feel epic at the time, but that soon changes once the dreaded post-sugar slump hits. Feel good about what you’re putting in your body by making a batch of raw homemade chocolate balls (Deliciously Ella's are good) instead and savouring Every. Single. Bite.
Surrounding yourself with meaningfulness
1. Know What’s Important
Know what’s important for you.
Write down your top 5 things that you believe are the essence of how you want to live life. This can include things like “family time,” or “sing every day.” It could also include more complex ideas, like “honesty” and “simplicity.”
You can use one of these colorful notebooks as they are meant to add joy in your daily life
2. Pursue Your Passion
I believe everyone should pursue their passion in life. It’s what makes life worth living, and gives our lives true meaning and purpose.
Each time you work on something you love, it creates joy inside you like nothing else. Finding a way to use your passions to give back to the world will give your life ultimate meaning. I discovered my passion was to share my joy. So I started this simple blog, hoping that I'm adding value to other people's lives. I feel passion also about home decor and garden cooking, so I put together my e-commerce business while stuck at home with the curfew ( visit here )
If you aren’t ready to work on your passion for a full-time living, be sure and make time for it every day. By working on your passion and becoming an expert in it, you will eventually have the opportunity to make money from it. Be ready to seize that opportunity!
3. Discover Your Life’s Purpose
If you had to give yourself a reason to live, what would it be? What would you stand for? What principles do you hold highest? Is your life’s purpose to help others? Is it to inspire others with great works of art, or you words?
We all are born with a gift. A gift that had been given to us. Finding this gift can be easy or a matter of years. But once you discover your gift, make your life around it. Because that gift will be the reason that you are unique.
Finding your life’s gift is a daunting task, and when I first heard the idea, I had no idea where to start. For methods on discovering your life’s purpose, I recommend reading the article from the beautiful blog of LifeHack.org What Makes Life Worth Living and How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up.
4. Be Self-Aware
Be aware of yourself and your actions. Remain mindful of what you do at all times, and make sure you are living life according to your principles, your life’s purpose, and what you are passionate about.
Review your actions each day, taking stock of those that strayed from your path. Work towards correcting any incidents in the future.
Meditation is a great tool for accomplishing this task. It helps us increase our self-awareness throughout the day.
I use meditation practices books and I started writing short meditation reads for my followers. You can find them here
Rather than chasing 3 or 4 goals and making very little progress on them, place all of your energy on one thing. Focus. Not only will you alleviate some of the stress associated with trying to juggle so many tasks, you will be much more successful.
Learn How to Stay Focused on Your Goals in a Distracting World. Try and align your goal with something you are passionate about, so that there will be an intrinsic drive to work hard and do well.
6. Spend Money on People More Than Things
Often, we are faced with wanting to buy material goods.
I recommend you consider carefully what you purchase, and think more about spending your money on experiences with friends and family. Not only will this give deeper meaning to your life by focusing on your relationships rather than material wealth, but you will be a happier person as a result.
Investing in how to create enjoyable moments at home while having friends around is a great investment. Consider adding décor to your yard so every time you invite friends and family, your moments will be remembered as enjoyable
7. Live With Compassion
Both for yourself, and others. Keep in mind the following quote:
For some, compassion is the purpose of life, what gives it meaning, and what leads to ultimate happiness.
I followed a few workshops about Intentional living and NVC (Non-violent Communication) This helped me to take compassion about myself and others. The whole life perspective changed and I suggest you to take a look about this topic and to read and to learn about. By applying this compassionate listening, you are not only supporting others but creating a nice ambiance to attract the type of acquittances that supports you
8. Find a Way to Give Back
Do something that both honors your beliefs and passions, while giving something back to the world.
By giving something back, we inevitably find purpose in the act. By cultivating more of these activities, you will find your life has more meaning and purpose behind it.
9. Simplify Your Life
By simplifying your life, you’ll have more time to do what fulfills you and gives your life meaning. It can also help reduce stress and make your overall life easier to manage. It can also greatly improve your productivity.
Simplifying life is also reading better. I enjoy reading poetry, this upgrades my reading skills and also my communication skills. Maybe you would enjoy this American poetry verses
10. Set Daily Goals
In the morning, before you start your day, create a list of 3 goals that you find fulfilling and meaningful. Make sure they adhere to your set of principles and beliefs.
Tackle the hardest things first! Don’t make this list too long. By placing too many things on the list, you’ll feel the urge to multi-task, which is not good, or you’ll feel overwhelmed, which isn’t good either.
By trying to do less, you’ll end up doing more. You can use a journal, I found this inspiring
The Bottom Line
Doing all of these things at once may seem daunting, but you can pick one thing at a time and slowly incorporate the ideas into your life.
Life is about the journey, not the destination. Living a life of purpose gives both fulfillment and meaning to your journey.
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